We are all strangers in a strange land, longing for home, but not quite knowing what or where home is. We glimpse it sometimes in our dreams, or as we turn a corner, and suddenly there is a strange, sweet familiarity that vanishes almost as soon as it comes.
And she comforts herself with books about people worse off then her, but whose lives she wants anyways.
only a matter of time.
anger. i feel it all the time. i mean all the time, from the moment i get up until i go to bed. half the time i dont know the cause of it. i just know i am angry. anxious. beyond belief. i am always skittish, always looking over my shoulder literally and figuritvely. constantly feeling like i am standing on the edge of a cliff and sometimes i wonder just who is standing behind me watching- waiting for me to jump. i’m waiting for me to jump, and you know 99.9% of the time jumping doesn’t sound like that bad of an idea. but, i cant jump…it’d only make things worse and i would end up in the looney bin, because they wouldn’t want to hear it. the explanation that is. so maybe it’s only a matter of time before someone realizes i am screaming behind this smile.
If you remember me, I don’t care if everybody else forgets.
